Should You Get Engaged?

In the book There Goes the Bride -- Making Up Your Mind, Calling it Off and Moving On, the following suggestions were made. Please consider them carefully:

• If you have mixed feelings about engagement, Don't! You need to be certain. If you get engaged, listen to the feelings, especially numbness or dread or just plain wrongness. These shouldn't be there.

• Engagement is a serious state. Listen to these words: 'Dating is one thing, but signing up for the rest of your life is liable to give anyone a few second thoughts. The challenge is deciding if you're suffering from garden-variety cold feet or what I call, "frozen footsies" -- a much rarer malady.

• Don't feel pressured into engagement or marriage because your biological clock is ticking faster and faster. As one woman said about making a mistake of becoming engaged, 'I was turning thirty and that expiration date stamped on my forehead was flashing so brightly that it blinded me from all the signs.'

• If you find yourself saying 'I love him or her, but...' why would you think of proceeding?

• Remember, a wedding is exciting but it lasts for just one day. Is this the person you want across the breakfast table from you every morning?

By: H. Norm Wright

*****************************************************

In order to marry the right person, you need to avoid marrying the wrong person. That means understanding when a relationship isn't going to work and ending it.
If you need to work hard just to understand the other person or work hard to feel good about the other person, that's tough.

How long would you go with this nice person? How long would you go with this low level of interest? Six months or so if you want to. when you get married, make sure it's a big emotional thing for you. Make sure that you just love this person so much.

The likelihood is, if a relationship is going to get good, it will get good early on because ultimately most relationships get good pretty early and you have a little bit of a tough time holding on to the goodness over the years.
If the relationship takes quite a while before it gets good, it's quite an unusual relationship. Six months is probably long enough to wait.

By : Neil Clark Warren